Diagnosis 2017

 So I realized that I jumped right in to treatment but never took the time to explain how I found out I had Colorectal Cancer. So today, I am taking a step back to the past! In this post I will delve into ancient history and share how things went down. I will use correct anatomical/medical terms and some information may be to much for readers. Again, I am sharing in the hopes of helping others with getting screened for cancer or those who may have been diagnosed and need some support- someone in their corner!

So in my 40's I developed issues with using the bathroom. When I would have bowel movements there would be blood with my stool. I just assumed this was because I was a bit constipated. Other times I would have very loose stools. I shared with my PCP and he felt I just had Irritable Bowel Syndrome or IBS. I kind of just blew it off and didn't push for more information- my bad! 

Then in October/November 2017 I was having difficulty eating. When ever I ate ANYTHING my stomach and intestines felt like they were going to war! I would have nausea and pain in my abdomen. It was horrible. One evening I couldn't take it any more so my husband took me to a stand alone ER. The doctor did blood work and a CT scan. I also had to complete this LONG questionnaire about my health. It took an hour to fill out. The doctor came to me and said that she was seeing that my intestines were full of stool. At that point she asked about my toileting habits. Needless to say I wanted to crawl under a table and die from embarrassment! After our discussion my embarrassment grew when she insisted on doing a rectal exam. I was thinking to myself, "I don't know you well enough." but I mustered the strength to let her complete one. I was MORTIFIED!!! After all of this the doctor referred me to a Gastroenterologist. 

The next day I called and scheduled an appointment with a GI doctor. I got in within a week. The doctor was a female and very nice. When she examined me, she asked me lots and lots of questions. She even mentioned she would like to do a rectal exam, but I declined. Modesty! When I told her about how I felt after eating she said that she needed to have me do a colonoscopy and endoscopy to look at my insides. Boy did that scare me! I remember my dad and all the comments he would make about these procedures and my anxiety went into overdrive. So we scheduled the procedures for December 27, 2017.

Christmas came and went and I was very careful about what I ate knowing I had to do the procedure prep on December 26. My husband got the prep kit from HEB and on the 27th I had a clear liquid diet for the day. At about 4pm I started the prescription prep kit. It took a while to drink down the vile liquid. I had one hour to drink. I managed to get it down but just barely. My stomach was not happy. So then I waited. We thought it was working about an hour later, but I vomited up everything! I was shaky, sweating, and so uncomfortable. My husband called the after hours hotline and spoke to a doctor. He explained what happened. I still had one bottle of the prep for the morning. The doctor decided we should use a different prep. He switched me to Miralax. So my husband went to HEB and got the biggest bottle he could find and I got to start over- LUCKY ME! We mixed HALF the bottle of Miralax with a drink and I started drinking. It was grainy and thick. Totally disgusting! I did manage to drink it and keep all of it down, but just barely. So that evening proceeded as needed.

The next morning I had to drink the other half of the Miralax. At this point my humor meter was very low. I managed to do it and everything happened that was supposed to. Then we were on our way to the clinic for my appointed time. Once I signed in and we waited, I eventually ended up in a little bay with a hospital bed. I got to complete more forms while running to the bathroom every few minutes. I got changed and ready for the procedure. The anesthesiologist came in and asked if I wanted anesthesia. Of course! I did not need to be awake for both procedures- NO THANK YOU! Finally the nurse came in and wheeled me to the procedure room. There were lots of machines and hoses. The doctor was in there and they had me position my body and then I went to sleep. I had a good nap!

I remember waking up, flat on my back with my husband by my side. Things were very fuzzy. The doctor came in and I asked her what she found. She showed me a picture of my colon with what looked like a GIGANTIC tumor in it. She said I had CANCER, as she suspected. I bawled and bawled, yelling "I don't want cancer." Her and my husband worked to calm me down. I'm pretty sure I still had lots of anesthesia in my system. I finally calmed down and stopped crying. To this date- that is the only time I ever felt sorry for myself or cried about cancer.

 I made a commitment to myself then and there that I would fight this and do it like my mom had. My mom spent 18 years with Ovarian Cancer before she passed away in 2019. She fought like crazy and never gave up until the end. She was always positive and lived life. I wanted to emulate her! I knew I couldn't be down trodden after watching her be so brave and courageous. 

The GI doctor came to see me before we checked out and I asked what was next. She said that she would contact my PCP (Primary Care Physician) and they would get me to a doctor quickly. Time was not on my side. The tumor in my colon had taken over the entire inside and there was a small opening for stool to pass through, but it was closing up. Within about 4 days I got a call that I had been referred to The Start Center. I got a call from The Start Center and had an appointment before I had to return to school teaching, after the holiday break. 

Within 2 weeks of all this I had my Medi-Port put in and my first chemo session. Needless to say this entire time period was a whirlwind and my head was spinning. What I learned was that I should have pushed my PCP for more when he said I had IBS. Don't know why I didn't but if I had my cancer story would probably be different- spilt milk- we'll never know. I also took my husband with me to all these first appointments to be an extra set of ears. Hearing you have cancer changes your life and is so overwhelming! With both of us at appointments, my husband could ask questions I may have forgotten I wanted to ask and fill in the blanks when I forgot some tidbit of information. 

I hope this post provided an understanding of how things went down. I apologize if anyone was grossed out. Colorectal Cancer is something we need to talk about more. It is rising in young adults 30-45. And sadly many of them are not finding out until it is end stage. If you have any symptoms, please learn from my embarrassment and speak up to your doctor. You DO NOT want to have a journey similar to mine! If you are 45 or older, please make sure to stay on top of the required screening. As I have told people- the worse part of a colonoscopy is the prep day. After that it's easy breezy and just might save your life!!